Tip#12: Learn how to operate a bathroom.
At some in your life you will need to venture out into the world without someone holding your hand. Please don’t make me your first stop. I really don’t have time to teach you how to operate the bath tub. If you turned it on I’m sure you can figure out how to turn it [...]
Posted at 1:29 PM on December 26, 2009 | leave a comment | Filed Under: I'm Not Joking, Uncategorized | read on
Tip #11: Don’t tell a whore you’re a fucking NFL player to try to get some ass.
When you leave the hotel to go hunt down some pussy, please take your pride with you. Don’t go to a bar and pick up on skanks by telling them that you play for an NFL team. For one thing, you look nothing like a football player. You are fucking 5 feet 8 inches tall [...]
